I just read my last note and realized how long it had been since i had written. I call myself a ‘writer wanna be’. I would love to be able to get paid to write. The thing is I write from my heart, out of my experiences and the things God is teaching me and showing me.It is my hearts desire that God would be glorified by my writing and use it to help others in their own struggles and trials, give encouragement, or help someone have a better understanding of God, a scripture, or how to live out the Christian life. Not because I have it all together, because I dont. I am learning as I go, as I seek to live out God’s word.
So in a sense, because i write from those things, I havent been inspired in a while, because I have been in my own trial and struggling with answers to whys, how, and what nows.
For some time I have been wrestling with God about things, trying to figure out what does He want to show and teach me. There are times when answers arent black and white in scripture, and knowing the ‘hows’ in a situation, is tough. It is tough also when you know something is NOT God’s will but yet He allowed something to happen against His will (but it wasnt really against His will or He wouldnt have allowed it,….you see what I mean?), so you seek to find what to stand on in His word, is there a promise to claim. I know people have their own choices and the consequences affect others, especially those close to them, but it is still hard. The part of living out your faith is hard too, when you know the truth in your head but your hurting and the pain is so great it clouds your discernment, you are overcome by hurt, shock, emotion….you know you arent suppose to be, your being human, but it is hard to help the feelings brought on. You dont conjure up the pain and feelings, they are there cause we are made as humans to feel. So living by faith is to remind yourself of Who God is by meditating on His word, thinking of what He has done in the past for you, how He has shown Himself to you before, even though in the midst He seems so silent and you feel alone. Living by faith is recognizing, this is how I feel but ‘this’ is what God says about >me, that issue, doing that,…..Living by faith is practicing what you know to be true even though you may feel differently. Living by faith is believing the truth so you can dispel the lies, discern the lies, fight the lies by taking them captive with the truth of what God says. (2 Cor 104-:5) And He does say something about any issue that could arise, there is nothing new under the sun. But sometimes some practicalities on how to live a truth out arent black and white in scripture.
I have said many times through this trial, I wish God would just send me a letter telling me what to do and how to handle this or that. But reality is, for one, He has given us a letter (His Word) . But you know the kind of letter im talking about, specific detailed answers about the exact situation your in. Well if He did that, we wouldnt have to live by faith, we wouldn’t fee/be desperate to seek Him.. So I am glad He doesnt really send that letter 
because I do want to grow closer to Him, learn some perseverance because I have to seek Him……
Living in the unknown is one of the hardest thing- unknown outcome, unknown length of time in this trial, unknown course of action, unknown consequences ….and when there is so much unknown, it leads us to fear. I believe the unknown and fear are great tactics satan loves to use against us. They paralyze us and make us useless when we give in to them. They are very defeating.
But you know what, God gives us a word for that too! (lots but this is the one i focus on)
For whatsoever is born of God overcometh the world: and this is the victory that overcometh the world, even our faith. (1 John 5.4)
And what is our faith? The next verse in 1 John says, see vs 5 Who is he who overcomes the world, but he who believes that Jesus is the Son of God. Our faith is belief in Christ, who He is, who His word tells us He is, who has shown us He is, ….and yes faith is the substance of things hoped for and the evidence of things not seen..(Heb 11:1) have we seen Jesus? no Do we hope for Him? yes!!!
So we have victory, we overcome, when we trust and have faith in Jesus. Faith in the gospel!
overcome is from a greek word that means ‘to conquer’, to have victory, to have superiority or conquering power. We have superior conquering power through our faith in Christ.
I have heard people say faith in Jesus is a crutch, or just something that people tell each other or themselves because they need something, or dont know what else to say so they use these little cliches.. Jesus is NOT a cliche! If you have experienced Him then you know he is real. that is all i have to say.
Gee I know I sound like I am chasing rabbits……so what started this….. well it was me reading to the kids. I have been going through Joshua with them and tonight we read chp 23. in vs 6-14….i will summarize the parts God jumped out at me. Joshua was fixing to die, and he was giving the people last encouragement…..he said to be courageous to keep and do the law SO THAT they wouldnt turn to the right or left from God….to hold fast to the Lord,….in vs 10 that God empowers those that are His, God gives the strength to be victorious….for the people to be careful to do these things OR ELSE they would have consequences…..vs 14 and you know in all your hearts and sould that NOT ONE THING HAS FAILED THE LORD YOUR GOD SPOKE CONCERNING YOU. ALL HAVE COME TO PASS FOR YOU, NOT ONE WORD HAS FAILED.
The same is true for us- God does not fail us. EVER!!!!
So when an incredibly difficult trial comes, one that is clearly not His will (such as the break up of a marriage. we know that is NOT His will) so do we trust Him, that He didnt fail to be our shield, refuge, deliverer,restorer …..? Of course He didnt fail. People fail. People have choices… Yes He allows trial, difficulty, (some of which are result of sinful choices whether yours or someone elses) sometime, and we may not understand it, but He doesnt fail. He is, always is, will be working for the good, the better good of all involved.
I wrestled for a while with God on some of these issues. I had to go back and ‘re-evaluate’ the basics of my faith. That is a good thing sometime, (God tells us to examine ourselves to see if our faith is genuiine 2 Cor 13:5) to go back over the basics of our faith and where we are in it. But I cant deny who God has been all these years in my life,all He has done for me, and His voice whispers to my heart and draws me. Nothing can separate me from the love of Christ- not the worst heart wrenching trail, most difficult circumstances, ….He does, He is and He will never leave or forsake His own and He will walk me through, day by day, by faith! and I will overcome through Him.
Often times in Psalms David was very discouraged, down and felt defeated, but he always CHOSE to trust the Lord, look to the Lord, praise the Lord, magnify the Lord
So let me encourage you, whatever trail you are facing- Magnify the Lord, not your circumstances……dont wallow in pity, pain or confusion….take the steps to be joyful, strong, faithful, ….in Him, through Him but clinging, holding fast to Him,….keep in the Word, and keep praying. be determined and CHOSE the Lord
